Ok, so we (we being
Chris, our friend William, and myself) went to Winco to get some
sloppy joe mix...nothing particularly unusual there, nor does
anything out of the ordinary occur until we get our happy little
can of mix home and read the instructions...if you can't tell
from the picture above (sorry about the poor quality), the can
clearly and proudly states that it contains "6 MAN-SIZE SERVINGS."
My first thought, as I looked at this can was that there was no
way it could feed six people. My second thought was wondering
if I could get away with suing them for sexual discrimination.
That aside, this can of sloppy joe mix barely fed 3 of us hungry
college students, let alone 6 grown men. Since I had witnesses,
I asked them to each write a review, which was probably a mistake,
since they're both notoriously silly and just made things
up. Oh well. Enjoy anyway.
Well, I picked up this
can expecting rather a lot I suppose. I was curious how so many
"man-sized" servings could fit in such a small container.
I thought it was worth a try anyway, so I cooked up a pound or
five of meat and covered it with the saucy goo inside, then laughed.
Surely this must be some kind of joke? That couldn't feed me,
let alone six of me! Then I realized it was simply a miswording:
it takes six cans to make one man sized serving! Having this figured
out, I went and purchased 5 more cans and another vanful of meat
and had myself a hearty dinner. Then I called the construction
people to widen my doorway again. I'll show them man sized!
I don't think that
I agreed with the claim that they were man-size servings, before
opening the container, unless of course it was so bad that it
would take that many men to consume that little volume of sloppy
After opening the container it smelled ok, so I assumed that it
was ok, but that the manufacturer was just wrong. Once I had eaten
one serving I began to feel a little light headed and realized
that the message was a warning that this can could kill this many
people for certain, the range due to the fact that man-sized is
not an exact definition.